Tag Archives: katherine riegel

Depression is a Trip – The Train

katherine riegel

I’ve been on these trips before. It’s terribly embarrassing because people often believe you bought that train ticket yourself, or something that happened to you gained agency—A. Death, Job Loss, Another F. Rejection—and all you need to do is track down that entity and face it in order to get off the train. So you’re on the Depression Train, it’s speeding along through a concrete wilderness, and people are saying, “Hey, why don’t you get off the train?” Well, more often they’re saying, “You could try this or this to get off the train,” helpfully, really, but the thing is you just can’t get off the effing train. It’s going full steam and if you managed to pry open one of the doors you’d just find yourself bruised on the hard gray world anyway.

From: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/60903404/posts/5023 read full post here.

DailyPrompt:Voyage

katherine riegel

Depression is a Trip – The Train

Depression is a Trip – Kayak

Depression is a trip – LSD

Depression is a Trip – Antarctica

 

Depression is a Trip – Kayak

katherine riegel

You can’t actually stop traveling, slogging through muck, unable to find a place to sit down to rest that isn’t even more miserable than the continual push. Once I overturned my kayak and sank to my crotch in silty mud. When I tried pulling one foot up, up, to the surface of the mud and putting it down again, I sank just as far. Other people went by in their kayaks and said, “Are you okay?” and I said, “Yes, I’ll get back on in just a minute,” though I had no real idea how I would do so. Embarrassment, shame, helplessness. No choice but to engage the mud.

From: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/60903404/posts/5023 read full post here.

DailyPrompt:Voyage

katherine riegel

Depression is a Trip – The Train

Depression is a Trip – Kayak

Depression is a trip – LSD

Depression is a Trip – Antarctica

Depression is a trip – LSD

katherine riegel

I don’t know much about drug trips from personal experience (unfortunately? I don’t know—I overheard some writers behind me at a reading recently talking about traveling the country on LSD when they were younger, and these were women in their 40s and 50s who were clearly oh so much more badass than they looked, and I confess I felt a bit envious, if also a bit ashamed at my own timidity), but it seems to me depression is like a drug trip for a lot of reasons. You don’t seem to have any control over how you perceive the world, or how you respond to it. You feel like you’re not your usual self, and you fear you may never get back to being your usual self, or that your “usual self” is in fact your “unusual self,” and the majority of who you are is actually A Depressed Person. Other people can tell you that your perceptions of reality are not accurate, but even when you accept that truth you still can’t make yourself perceive reality differently and react to it appropriately.

From: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/60903404/posts/5023 read full post here.

DailyPrompt:Voyage

katherine riegel

Depression is a Trip – The Train

Depression is a Trip – Kayak

Depression is a trip – LSD

Depression is a Trip – Antarctica

Depression is a Trip – Antarctica

katherine riegel

Depression is a wildly confusing, exhausting trip to someplace you didn’t actually ever intend to go. Let’s say you set out for Austria, had in mind a little singing on mountaintops like in The Sound of Music, and you end up getting on the wrong plane and find yourself in Antarctica. Did you know the average temperature during the coldest three months in Antarctica is MINUS 81 degrees Fahrenheit? So you are in this place, so bitterly cold that it’s hard to move, your limbs lock up and your face freezes if you try to uncover it. If you expose any of your tender self, even a little, it goes from cold to burning to numb so fast you just know you’ll be dead if you don’t cover up again. You didn’t intend to come here and you don’t quite know how you got here and you haven’t figured out how to leave. You don’t really want to see your loved ones here because you’re afraid they’ll freeze, too; sometimes you feel like you’re talking to them through a video link, and they’re far away, and you sort of wonder if they aren’t just better off staying far away from you and your inimical tendency to lose yourself in dark and dangerous places.

From: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/60903404/posts/5023 read full post here.

DailyPrompt:Voyage

katherine riegel

 

Depression is a Trip – The Train

Depression is a Trip – Kayak

Depression is a trip – LSD

Depression is a Trip – Antarctica